You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
