your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Even my vagina gasped.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Randomize
