You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I think my fart just growled at me.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
