I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Walk of Shame today included voting.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
