Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I would ride that face into the sunset
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize
