I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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