well I can't set my house on fire every night
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
