we're blogging at a bar
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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