What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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