I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I supernannyed him into submission
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
