I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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