the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
