We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
