that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize