im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
