I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
