In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Randomize