Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
