i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
