he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
We are two peas in an std pod
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Randomize
