Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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