He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
