Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
