His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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