Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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