Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
