May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
COCAINE IS GR8
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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