he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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