Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
You just made me feel so damn special
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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