Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
