Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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