Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize
