Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I cockslap morals
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
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