...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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