She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
