Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
She bit a glass in half.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Randomize
