I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up backwards on a recliner
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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