Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
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