Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
