the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
