I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
do herpes really smell.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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