we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
