You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
