I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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