did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize