It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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