i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I have demons in me.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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