420 ftw
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Randomize
