Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
