No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
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His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
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I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
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